the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
