Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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