they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Randomize
