I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Randomize