Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
