where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
So apparently I’m into choking now
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