So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
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