i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
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