Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
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