Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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