this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
be right there i have to get my cape
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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