Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
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