Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize