he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Randomize
