I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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