weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
accomplished twins. life is a go
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
