I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Randomize
