Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
