Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
