Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Randomize