Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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