Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
