I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
