i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
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