Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
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