pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
