Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
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