I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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