hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
