Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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