you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
