I didn't shave. On purpose
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize