Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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