I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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