think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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