You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
