It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
