i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize
