Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
