But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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