I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
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