Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
