How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
