I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Randomize
