On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
