evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
