PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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