The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
