why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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