don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
